Name Change

To the Bureau of Motherly Affairs, Name Change Department:

12/9/2005

Dear Office of Motherly Affairs:

I am acknowledging your paperwork, requesting a permanent name change. In February 2002 I received one (1) delivery of 8 lb. 2 oz. baby boy at 6:01 pm. Soon thereafter baby boy began speaking and I became 'mama' or 'mommy'. 'Mommy' has been fine. I have even been completely fine with being introduced as 'Wilson's Mommy'. This title was fine. I am fine with 'Mommy'.

I am accepting a permanent name change from you now for the following reason - slowly after Thanksgiving my son, issued to me in 2002, began replacing 'Mommy' with 'Mom'. I thought this was a phase, introduced to him by noticing that my brother, sister, and I refer to our own mother as 'Mom'. I believed this would pass. It has not.

He has transitioned to this much like he weened himself. It snuck up on me. I have tried correcting this by saying 'Mommy' everytime he says 'Mom'. I have tried ignoring him until he switches back and calls me 'Mommy'. This last technique has completely backfired - instead of switching back to 'Mommy' he escalates to 'Jolene'.

I am not excited about this name change. I have waited many years to be 'Mommy' and somehow he feels I've moved to 'Mom'. Somehow he has gathered that since there is a sibling on the way he must become the "big boy" and he believes this means he can no longer call me 'Mommy'. This has happened entirely too fast for someone who has waited so long to hear 'Mommy' in reference to herself. For one thing, I have a Mom. I have noticed several things that are different between 'Mommy' and 'Mom:

• You snuggle with Mommy. You roll your eyes at Mom when she asks if you want to snuggle.
• You kiss Mommy in front of everyone without hesitation. You pretend like Mom is a stranger so your friends think you gave birth to yourself.
• You pick all sorts of flowers, weeds, grasses for Mommy because she is on your mind. Mom has to hound you down for a 5 second response to "How was your day?"

Basically this all boils down to thinking you need 'Mom' less than you need 'Mommy'. Maybe. Maybe he does need me less than he did a few weeks ago. I would like to file a complaint with your department - you should have allowed me to stay 'Mommy' with this child until the one that is currently in the production process learned to say 'Mommy'. I fear this second child will stay in the 'Mommy' phase for a shorter period of time since there will already be another person in the house giving me the 'Mom' treatment.

Reluctantly I await your permanent change to my name. I am not happy about this. Not happy at all. This was a terrible thing to do to me, 8 months pregnant and at the Holiday Season, no less. I am notifying all of his friends' mommies, and they are aware of the upcoming change. We would boycott, but we have all decided to let them grow, reluctantly. I take solice in knowing that one day he will go from hearing 'Daddy' to 'Dad' and he will understand why I've had a confused, pained look on my face these last few weeks.

On a related topic - why is it the same time I became 'Mom' did his 'daddy' suddenly become 'Your Honor'? I would like to point out here that while his father has sat for jury duty, he has no experience in legal issues - unless it's representing himself in traffic court...

I still think this was a terrible time for you to spring the name change on me. It is, after all, Christmas.

Sincerely,

Wilson's Mom